Thursday, 30 June 2011

Big Fat Positive

BFP. It sounds a little like a character from a Roald Dahl novel and much less like a reference to that momentous occasion when you find out you're pregnant for the first time. My husband and I were exceptionally lucky and we were able to conceive in the first month of trying. I felt pregnant...I knew I was and yet it still took weeks after the Big Fat Positive to really start believing it. I was excited, I was feeling pretty good. I'd even escaped the worst of the dreaded Morning Sickness. This was going to be a breeze. And at the end of my perfect pregnancy, I'd give birth to a perfect child (that's the kind that sleeps through every night, is never sick and definitely doesn't answer back) and we'd all live happily ever after.


In those heady early days of trying to conceive and pregnancy when many don't want to share the big news, we are now able to turn to the internet to find solidarity amongst the hundreds of other women waiting for that all-important 12 week scan. As I was initiated into the world of pregnancy forums, I quickly developed a whole new vocabulary - starting with the '2WW' (two week wait), that nail biting wait each month before you can take a pregnancy test and hopefully progressing quickly from the BFNs (Big Fat Negatives) in the TTC (Trying to Conceive) phase to the BIG FAT POSITIVE. After that, there are a mind-boggling number of acronyms from LOs (Little Ones) and DH (Dear Husbands) to MW (Midwives) and BF (Breast Feeding).

I didn't realise when I signed up to that forum just what a life saver it would be. It turns out I didn't have the perfect pregnancy or the painless childbirth I had fantasised about (what a shocker). But when the going got tough, I found I had a very welcome outlet for my questions and anxieties - not just for that initial 3 months but in fact, all the way through pregnancy and beyond. With my new found group of online friends, all due in the same month as me, I was able to discuss even the most sensitive of issues and bodily functions (providing such posts are preceded with the warning 'TMI' - Too Much Information!).

So, in an era where internet friendships are, at best, tolerated and more often belittled, I found a very valuable and supportive group of friends. Long may it continue.

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